Fragility

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Fragile

Many good souls are very strong yet gentle though they harbor much fragility within their personality.

We store up so much pain, trauma, anxiety and suffering throughout our life time.  As we agree with Our Heavenly Father to face and work through the negative energy we have stored up these are our fragile points the parts of our life which have hurt us the most.  More often than not inflicted by other people who perhaps subtly or obviously have harmed us.

We store the pain and suffering in different parts of our body unless we start to focus on to the reason why we are suffering this can turn into sickness or disease within the body.  The cause and the effect.

What caused the sickness or disease?

If you allow yourself to face the truth of your life you will find out the whys.

I have been suffering on a regular basis of sharp pain in my hip joint and abdominal pain, along with vomiting and diarrhoea which last for at least half a day.  The cause or trigger is also due to choice of food but there was a true underlying cause.  A painful period in my life which resulted from an abusive action by my son of being thrown across the kitchen landing heavily on the floor.  I just got in my car and drove to the sea and paced up and down the beach crying as the waves crashed on the shore I felt so sick and helpless. Waves were pulling at the pain and suffering making me shed my tears.

My Soul and body were telling me it is time to face this issue.  I have called previously my “Wounded Healer” I had really been wounded physically and emotionally.  The pain had come to the surface to be healed along with emotional pain of that time in my life I felt physically ill and I was terrified to go home. I went to work covered in bruises.  Believe it or not I worked with many women and not one asked me if I was all right. “Women”.  One of the managers a man asked me if I was all right and I said I was but really was not, I was in so much shock.  My son became abusive again and I called the police which I should have done in the first place, I did not as I was so shocked.  If someone told me my son could be so abusive to me I would not have believed them.  The police made him leave the home.  I will not go into details as I have faced all the details with Our Heavenly Father nothing missed.  I had reviewed this issue many times before and accepted it but not the whole effect of what went on and the depth the negative emotions had harmed me.

The pain was so intense it felt like an anchor was being ripped out of my Soul Center. It actually tore as I let go of him, NO MORE.  I had dedicated my life to him and his well-being but it was a complete waste of time and I still believe he was a waste of my time and life.

There came a point in my life where I was asked by Our Heavenly Father to let go of my son completely as there would be no further reconciliations.  I have done this.  I have healed this trauma from every level of my being.

Many people do not agree with me that I have completely walked away from my son.  You know what I could not put myself through this again.  I deserve to have a life too, to be free of fear.  From that day on-wards I built my resilience, inner strength in how to deal with evil.  I came face to face with it.  This gave me the strength to survive the last village I lived in.  My closest friend here decided this had to stop and moved me away.

Now I have the time to calm and heal off so many things in my life.

I am able to look at other points in my life which made my personality fragile and I only share these fragile parts of my life with my closest friend here.

When we are fragile our trust in Our Heavenly Father is a must, this is how I have survived and lived.  We have to heal ourselves it is not going to just disappear with the wave of a hand if so I would have done this years ago.

Learning to grow closer to Our Heavenly Father is to allow HIM to show you how to heal yourself and through your Soul the answers come.  HE wants you to heal and to learn to do what is right by you.

As I often say as one man’s food is another’s poison.   Taking another’s medication could kill you just because you are too lazy to deal with it yourself.

Face yourself

Do not be afraid of yourself or allow the fears of how others will judge you.

Abusive people can only be abusive if you do not stop them.

You are entitled to a life no matter how old you are.

You can start now.

 

© 2019  Nanette de Ville – All Rights Reserved.

 

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